Eh brah! You were sitting in the coffee shop, talking to your mother at epic loudness! Take your over-age, uncooth self and talk on the frickin’ speaker phone outside! No one wants to hear you whine about how difficult it is to live on Maui–how you’re having a hard time to find a place to rent or a woman or how your ex still has all your stuff! Get a life! No wonder you can’t find a place… You’re too loud!
Illustration by Ron Pitts